What Do You Want to Do Before You Die?

In 1852, British poet Matthew Arnold wrote,

But often, in the world's most crowded streets / But often, in the din of strife / There rises an unspeakable desire after the knowledge of our buried life. / A thirst to spend our fire and restless force / In tracking out our true, original course.

In 2010, MTV premiered a reality show about four Canadians on a mission to cross off ambitious items on their "bucket list" of a hundred things to do before they die. Titled, "The Buried Life," the show followed these devastatingly handsome twenty-somethings as they traveled the country on a reclaimed purple transit bus and got themselves into various shenanigans in order to attend a party at the Playboy Mansion (number 6), and make a toast at a stranger's wedding (number 41). For every item they cross off their list, the boys help a stranger do the same, such as the episode in which they helped Queen locate her mother's grave after she died in Hurricane Katrina. The inspiring nature of the boy's mission, their great senses of humor, and undoubtedly their good looks combined to make a popular primetime spot that got picked up for a second season last September. With two seasons of a television show (number 53 is "start a television show") under their belt, the Buried Life team is riding out their popularity by touring the country and speaking a colleges. On Friday, April 1st (no fooling), the Buried Life cast came to Penn State. As an avid Buried Life fan, I was in the sixth row and checking their twitter feed to follow their progress from University Park airport to the HUB. While I think the presentation was great because the entire cast is incredibly charismatic and likable, I couldn't help but notice a few weaknesses in their presentation -- LA 101H ruined my perception of rhetorical situations by actually educating me about them...

Jonnie Penn, 24, speaks to Penn Staters at Alumni Hall.

The cast put quotes on the screen such as, "Right now you are the youngest you'll ever be," to add some inspiriation to the PowerPoint, but the words were just left up on the screen without being read and then a new slide came up about a certain list item. In an audience participation section, Jonnie, one of the cast members, made an audience member stand there awkwardly while he found the perfect music on his iTunes to soundtrack giving her a hug. The boys each took turns talking, but during their individual scripted parts the rest of the cast was joking around with each other. As a presentation, they could have done a little better. But as an experience, the Buried Life was awesome -- they're funny, friendly, play awesome music, and have important things to say about going after what you want in life. And everywhere they go, they ask, "What do you want to do before you die?"

Take a side.

So a few minutes ago, my glorious Van Morrison Pandora Radio streaming was interrupted by an advertisement. This was confusing. Instead of more smooth oldies, I heard Jersey Shore star Pauly D.'s voice declaring his adamant distaste for Miracle Whip. Although I had never seen this specific ad, I recognized MiracleWhip's even more confusing theme for for the advertising campaign, in which they draw a line in the sand(-wich) and order lunch eaters across the country to "take a side." Check out the Pauly D. ad below. You can see the rest of the commercials for the campaign on MiracleWhip's YouTube channel, as well.

I see what they did there. Pauly D., much like the rest of his Seaside Heights roommates, is "a little loud," and "a little tangy." Like MiracleWhip tastes! And -- don't judge me -- I love Pauly D. So I probably love MiracleWhip, because they have so much in common.
Oh wait, I hate MiracleWhip. And apparently so does Pauly D. Which, according to the commercial, means I can be his girlfriend. Even better. Thank you, MiracleWhip, for establishing a mutual distate for your product between the spokesperson and the audience.
That's not the only problem with this ad, though. In general, this entire campaign urging the audience to "take a side," is a thinly veiled attempt to be edgy and interesting. MiracleWhip acknowledges their sub-par stigma among other classic sandwich spreads such as mayonnaise and mustard by saying, "We're not for everyone." Then, not unlike the Statue of Liberty holding her torch, a fist raises into the frame, clenching a delicious-looking sandwich. It's worth noting that the sandwich looks so good because of all the ingredients together, not just the condiments, and that the MiracleWhip on it actually looks like mayo.
This ad might have worked if they were blatantly making fun of Pauly D., a public figure who despite massive popularity lacks significant credibility. The narrative would then be something along the lines of, "Pauly D. doesn't like MiracleWhip. And we all know he's stupid. Therefore, we can gather that he is wrong about MiracleWhip and it's actually awesome. Buy it." However, MiracleWhip actually identifies its product with Pauly D.'s vivacious personality, so they can't be making fun of him because they would then be making fun of themselves. But if they're not saying Pauly D. is wrong, they're saying he's right -- that MiracleWhip is, in fact, disgusting.
I get that MiracleWhip is trying to be funny and confident by facing the haters head on, but echoing sentiments about how gross their product tastes isn't going to sell any more jars of the stuff. Especially when, instead of contradicting this popular opinion by touting its benefits, MiracleWhip closes with an open-ended question: "Are you MiracleWhip? Get a taste and decide." Nah, I'm good.